Learning from the learned

Dont look back under any circumstance, they say.
There is a saying: do not look back even to catch your breath.
But sometimes it is good to look back, to see how things were before, how you were before.
Taking into account your past is sure something helpful when confronting the present and the future, and that is something we forget one too many times.
When I look back, I see many pages full of words, I see hidden meanings, I see a lot of books that I read and enjoyed, I see what I did right, what I did wrong.
I look back, at the footsteps behind my back, and I see how much I have learned, but that does not blurr my vision for the future, for I know there is still a lot to learn.
Being eager to learn not only means investing time and energy into learning something in the present, but learning from the past, dont forget that.


Doing wrong, being wrong

It is ironic how I expected others to do things for me I was not prepared to do for them.
Many times had I wondered why no one cared, why no one left any sort of message, and then I realised that the problem was also embedded within me. I was not giving them what I asked them to do for mw, so how could I sincerely expect them to do anything?
I was lucky I came to that realization before it was too late.
It was thanks to a little project I had started and nobody except me knew about.
But that little project helped me see the hipocrisy of my ways.
Now I am willing to give to others what I would like to receive and i really believe that someday it might pay off and I will be able to see the results of my actions.

PS: any comment about this blog, wether good or bad, would mean the world to me, consider leaving one before closing this entry. Thank you for reading.


Art as in Artist

Nothing is as easy as it looks...
Walking is something you learned, you dont remember, but you had a tough time.
Speaking, writting, running, reading, all that took so much effort even though you can not remember.
And keeping a diary is a difficult task, too.
Seating yourself in front of the white page, facing the challenge that is filling it with ink every single night telling an imaginary reader what you might have accomplished that day and what your dreams and hopes for the future are.
Noone besides you is going to read it, but despite that you put so much effort into elaborating something that is not only appealing to the eye, but also to the mind.
You, who keeps a diary, are challenging yourself to do something just for the fun of it, you are incredible.
You are creating something for the sake or art, and art will repay you sooner or later.
Keep that in mind


breaking a habit, making a habit

They say it's very difficult to break a habit but I know for sure that it's also very hard to make one.
Darkness had accompanied me most of my time during my first few weeks, I think it might have been weeks but I can't be sure since there was no way to keep track of time, and the light seemed at first comforting company.
But it was not enough.
I had to do something, there were just too many spare hours in my days that were wasting away due to my inability to actually do something.
I had to change that, but in order to do so I would have to make a habit, no easy task for someone like me.
I am the kind of person who has trouble when starting something, the first step is the most difficult one for me, once I get that one going, the rest just comes naturally, just as the words on this paper are being written without previous thought.
There was paper and there were writting utensils, I needed nothing more appart from that and the light bulb hanging from the ceiling.
So there I silently sat staring at the satinated stern walls with no thought in mind regarding what I should write down, what could be relevant, what could even transcend someday, if and only if I were to get out of here.
But suddenly it came, the idea that started all this madness, the spark of sanity in the sea of caos that had become my mind for the past minutes.
Just write
It seemed so simple and yet so incredibly vague that it frightened me.
Just write?
Just write
Write for yourself, write for the ones that will never see this pages, write for the ones who will, write for someone who might be trapped as you are, write for the free, write for the young, write for the old, for the ones already gone and the ones that have yet to come
Just write
And so I sat down and began writting down everything I could remember about how I had gotten into this mess and how my existence had carried on trapped in between these four walls.


I've always wanted to become a surgeon, said the writter

In a prelude to a book I read, I stumbled upon a story that changed my perspective on writting.
The man said he had to attend to all these meetings with fancy people and give them conversation.
During those he would always encounter one or two that approached him, I think it is my obligation to inform you that he was a writter, and told him how they had always wanted to get their little novels and other writtings published.
He would usually dismiss the topic falsely encouraging them to carry on with their literary adventure, but as time passed yet the same kind of people approached him with the very same topic, he thought of a better way to dismiss them.
He told them about how he had always wanted to become a surgeon.
The shocked and surprised faces of the people were priceless.
In order to become a writer, you have to write, there is no other way around.
You have to write a lot and have to read a lot, and when I say a lot I mean a huge amount.

I hope I will be able to take this advice to heart and start writting on a more regular basis...
Only time will tell wether I was or not able to accomplish such a feat...
Wish me luck...

(Adaptation from the introductory text of a stephen king book ill mention in a future entry)